"Sometimes I'd like to ask God why He allows poverty, famine, and injustice in the world when He could do something about it...but I'm afraid God might ask me the same question."

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

More About Hair...

As many adoptive moms know, hair care and styling can be quite an adventure. I remember thinking that I was ready for Grace's hair before we traveled to Ethiopia. I had my supplies and was all set to "style" her hair and make sure she looked good (I had heard how important it is to AA women to not screw up hair care!- I didn't want to offend anyone in Ethiopia...the Ethiopian women were wonderful and told me daily that I needed to make sure to "oil" Grace's hair). Well, luckily, she didn't have much hair to worry about. We just needed a little spray conditioner and some cute headbands and we were all set.

Well, times have changed! Grace has a lot more hair to deal with now. I love her hair and I feel very lucky that she has "good hair" (according to the AA women that have seen her hair).

There is hope for me yet! For the past six months, I have been buying a ton of hair care products, experimenting with conditioners, trying to figure out Grace's specific hair type, and doing my best to learn about her hair.

After all the searching, shopping, and spending, I have come up with my three favorite products. AND...of course, they came from fellow adoptive moms and bloggers! I knew I could count on you to help me navigate my way through the "hair thing."

I have to also admit that I have gone WAY overboard on hair accessories. Here is Grace with a sampling of her "pretties" (and some funky dress up clothes). Luckily, she loves having her hair done and will cooperate when I am trying to style her hair. This does NOT include combing her hair. She HATES that...don't they all?

We try to keep her "pretties" organized on a couple of long ribbons that hang in her closet. As you can see, she is not in any need when it comes to pretty flowers and bows for her hair (and yet I still seem to buy more...I have a problem in this department-we'll save that for another post).

One of my favorite places to get bows, headbands and flowers is Hobby Lobby. They have them all set to go (on barrettes) and are so cheap. I have also found that it is super easy to create pretty flowers and clips by purchasing craft flowers in the scrapbooking isle. They are often 50% off and are so easy to glue on a little barrette. This way, I can get a couple of flower things that match and use them as a pair when I do little pig tails on the front of Grace's head. I have also bought the pre-made bows and hot glued little Halloween or Valentine's Day do dads on them for a cute holiday look.

As far as products go, I have spent a ton figuring out what works best for Grace. I was willing to spend a little more on a product if it delivered. This didn't turn out to be necessary for us. Each head of hair is unique, but, for us, the products that I prefer happen to be the cheaper ones. Yeah!

I only wash Grace's hair about every week to ten days. She gets plenty of conditioner washes in between the shampooing. When we do shampoo, we use a conditioning shampoo and follow up with an intense deep conditioner (she sits in the bath playing for quite a while on these days). We also comb the conditioner through her hair every time we use it.

Hawaiian Silky is a new product for us. Thank you to Jen for recommending this! I love it for those days when Grace's hair looks like it needs a little more conditioner in the morning. We spray on (quite a bit) the product. We joke that she is a grandma when we do this, because her hair looks white when we are done spraying. In a matter of seconds though, all of the product is absorbed by her hair (we just run our fingers through her hair and it disappears).

This little goody was also recommended by Jen. It is called the Tangle Teaser. It is a special brush that is supposed to work wonders on curly hair. For me, the jury is still out on this brush. I like it, but it has not proven to be as spectacular as I thought it would be. I usually finger comb Grace's hair and then use a wide tooth comb to distribute product.
I use coconut oil a couple of times a week before bedtime. We buy our coconut oil at the health food store. It is a solid, but when we rub it in our hands, it turns to liquid and then we apply it to her scalp and hair. She smells like a little Almond Joy when we are done.

These are our every day "go to" products. We have a very simple routine. Thank you so much Kristi J. for recommending these products! They are easy to find (Target) and really cheap. Pantene Relaxed and Natural Conditioner and Pantene Relaxed and Natural Daily Moisture Cream. I mix a little bit of the conditioner and water in a spray bottle. I spray this mixture on Grace's hair in the morning, after nap, and any time it looks a little dry. I follow up with the daily oil cream. The cream goes on white and looks pretty creamy, but Grace's hair absorbs the cream really fast. The oil cream really helps to define the curls and keep the hair looking good.
So there you have it. This is the routine that works for us. I would still love to learn about other products that fellow bloggers like. I am sure I will continue on my search for the BEST products, but for now, we are set with our simple hair care routine. Grace's braids and beads were in for about two weeks. They looked good, but the braids got a little too frizzy for me by week two. I did notice that when we took the braids out, her hair felt great and seemed to have grown. Do braids and protective styles really help hair grow??? I'm not sure, but it seemed that way.
Hope these tips help - Happy Tuesday!


  1. Thanks for these tips! I am trying to wrap my head around of what type of routine we'll need for little Greer when he gets home. I feel very inadequate so any advice helps. Thanks!!

  2. Yeah! Love it when we can find something and it makes a difference:) Love her bows.

  3. Deena... not only are Avé and Grace twins separated at birth- I think YOU AND I are too!!! ;-) I have the same problem with buying "pretties"- Grace's collection looks all too familiar to me! But what can we say? We like our girls to be happy. And cute. ;-)

    What kind of sleeping cap do you use? I ordered 2 from a lady in Canada (recommended by another AP) but we have now lost both of them. :-( Gotta get something else and soon! She's been sleeping w/ a scarf wrapped around her head- cute but not as protective as I'd like. (she also has a silk pillowcase... little princess...)

    One of my AA friends told me that those protective styles really do help hair to grow- and I think after having Av's hair in those yarn braids for a month it has grown about an inch!!! Amazing.

    Fun post, twin! ;-)

  4. Hello, I came across your blog through Kristi Johnsons. I am an AA woman with hair very similiar to Grace's and I must say you are doing a great job.She seems to be a 3c/4a. Just so you know keeping her hair in braids does work wonder becuase it allows the hair to grow without constant maipulation.The less naturally curly/kinky hair is manipulated the better, as out hair is very fragile. However, I just want you to know that the term "good hair" is a "loaded" term in the AA community, as it can be taken to have negative connotations.

    I recommend the following sites/blog to you in case you were interested in natural haircare.

    Beads,Braids and Beyond
    Keep Me Curly
    Her Best Hair
    Happy Girl Hair
    Naturally Curly
    Long Hair Care Forum