Grace continues to amaze me. She also continues to drive me a bit nutty some days. She has so much to offer. She is adorable (duh), smart (she recently started writing words...like all on her own), outgoing, and so resilient. The thing is...she is also different than my other kids in respect to one thing- how she responds to me. I know with 100% certainty that my three oldest kids feel an unconditional love for me as their mom. It is obvious (to me) that when an infant comes to a family, they are completely reliant on the parents for care. There is a certain type of bond that exists because of necessity (among other things of course). My first three kids shared this experience with me. Grace, on the other hand, didn't. She is very independent. She seems to view me as her mom, whom she loves, but I also believe that she views me as the caretaker that gets in her way at times. She reacts to me in ways that I am unfamiliar with. She doesn't seem to need the same things from me. Adopting an "older child" can be hard. Things are not perfect. Feelings get hurt.
There are days when I wonder if Grace has a little of this guy in her...
BUT...I also know that she has been through a lot. So, when she tells me that she "doesn't need me to come to school" with her on her 'special helper day' (like the other moms do), I need to remember that it might not be because she doesn't want me there, but that she might not need me there...(my feelings were hurt by her announcement that she didn't want me to stay at school). I need to remember that Grace is so darn independent and smart, that I am pretty sure she could take care of herself in most ways. She would easily be able to dress herself, clean up after herself, she could probably cook for herself, and I bet she could earn a living on her own if she had to (some type of entertaining...maybe a street side singer/dancer?).
So...today as I reflect on little Miss Grace, I need to remember: